Allow me to set the scene for you. It's early in the seventeenth century, a woman in pilgrim garb who looks to be in her late thirties or early forties is running through the woods with her breasts exposed. Actually the movie starts with a tight shot of her nipple. Something that apparently sees everything in shades of purple is chasing her. Eventually she trips and falls boobs first in the dirt and is murdered by a fowl (get it... bird joke!) mouthed turkie wielding an axe. That is the best scene of the movie. The rest is pretty much down hill from here.
ThanksKilling was released in 2009 and stars Natash Cordova, Lindsey Anderson and Lance Predmore. It was directed by Jordan Downey (for those curious, Mr. Downey is in the process of filming a sequal to this film. It will most likely appear on this blog in 2012). I"mnot even gonna try and sell you on this one. It sucks. I'm used to seeing bad writing, directing, effects and acting, but with alot of other films in this genre, you can tell that the people who made it really had heart and were really trying to make a good movie. This on the other hand, has no heart and no soul. It feels like the people who made this movie made it just because they had nothing better to do. The acting is so bad it's almost as if the actors aren't even really trying. No joke the best performance comes from M.I.L.F. porn star Wanda Lust (she's the pilgrim with the boobs).
The other thing that bothers me about this film is it's supposed to be a comedy but it's just not funny... at all. Seriously, how many bird puns can you make in a film that's only sixty-some-odd minutes long. I'm gonna have to advise you to stay away from this one. It's just not worth the time you'll spend watching and then trying to forget it.
This is part three of a three part series, so like I said in the second part, if you have not seen the first two (we skipped the film in the series because it was made clear to me by more than a few people that it just wasn't worth watching and you could watch the third without missing any of the plot) you might not want to read this because there will be spoilers...
So by comparison to the first two movie I watched from this series, this one is actually kind of a let down. The film opens with our main character, Nami (Once again very well portrayed by Meiko Kaji), once again out of prison and attempting to evade authorities. This is a plot hole. (Spoiler) The last movie ended with her intentionally going back to prison so she could torture an evil pimp who held her friend captive. So how the hell did she get out? I also noticed while watching that the overall style of the film seemed to be some what diminished. It was a lot less colorful and a lot of the cool dialogue seems to have gone missing entirely. It's my theory that the overall problem with this film is Yasuharu Hasebe taking over as director.
Another problem here is that the film is trying to put forth a message of anti-authority and the horrors of capital punishment. Unfortunately the message is lost in scenes that are needlessly violent and characters who seem to make erratic decisions. At one point I found myself asking, "Why are they raping her?" "Why did I need to see that?" I'm not going to go on a lecture here about how there is too much violence, nudity or sexuality in films, I'm just saying that it all needs to have purpose. If it does not serve the plot, it does not need to be there.
In closing, I won't say that this film was bad, it just wasn't good enough. Unfortunately I can't even tell you to watch it as a stand alone, because then you'll just spend an hour and a half with a lot of unanswered questions. Watch the first and third (the second is terrible, remember?) and if you still feel like you need closure then watch it. If not, just be happy with the last films ending and pretend this one doesn't exist. It's like the Rocky V of Japanese women in prison films.
So let me say this right off the bat, the film featured on this weeks blog is a sequel to last weeks entry (true, there is one film between the two, but this one is far superior to that sequel and picks right up where the first film left off. By skipping the second film, you're not missing anything. I promise). By reading this you will know the ending to the first film. This is the official "Spoiler Alert." If you read any further it will ruin the ending to Female Prisoner #701: Scorpion. She kills the guy who set her up and his whole crew after she escapes from prison. Told you so.
Wow. This is a really good follow up. I have to admit I'm kinda jaded when it comes to sequels. Lets face it, we live in a society where a second and/or third film normally means ninety minutes of actors and actresses not returning, directors not returning, bad plots and movies made quick and cheep just to cash in on the success of the original. Director Shunya Ito clearly has his shit together. The first thing he does right is bring back Meiko Kaji as Nami Matsushima (Scorpion). No joke, she plays this role so well, if I ever run into her in person I'm going to turn around and walk away out of fear for my life.
The story follows our main character, Nami, as she is now out of prison and trying to evade authorities (she doesn't help that cause by spending the duration of the opening credits running through Tokyo waving a severed arm around). Not long into the movie she befriends a down-and-out prostitute and soon attempts to liberate her from her pimps. Despite the films plot (and the previously mentioned severed arm waving), this one is actually a bit slower than the first. There is some graphic violence (I don't want to give to much away, but there's a pretty nasty scene with a golf club and I'm wondering if writer, Hiro Matsuda, has something against pregnant women), but is few and far between. There is also not a lot of nudity when you compare it to the first as well. The main focus here seemed to be character building and giving the audience a bit more of an idea as to what makes Nami tick.
Overall, I have to say this is a pretty great follow up. Meiko Kaji turns in a great performance despite the fact that her character is silent through most of the film. The plot also serves the first film well while leaving out enough details to still be enjoyable if you haven't seen the first. The only question left is how good will a third film be?
Did you see the arm in the trailer? Awesome, right?
Love,
The B-Movie Guy
#Bmovieblog #Femaleprisoner701
Holy Japanese-women-in-prison-films was this film ever awesome! No joke, I have run the complete gamut of emotions with in the last hour and a half. First I was laughing, then I was mad as hell, then I was almost crying and then i was... well... you know... Anyway. I must say this film really impressed me. I am no stranger to women's prison films (ex: "Caged Heat(1974)" and "Women In Cell Block 7(1974)"), but this one is different! It was directed by Shunya Ito, and it stars Meiko Kaji, Rie Yokoyama and Isao Natsuyagi. It was released (in Japan) in 1972. The plot of the film is a woman is tricked by her police officer boyfriend and sent in undercover on a drug bust which leads to her brutal rape. Later she attempts to kill her now exboyfriend in an act of revenge and is sent to prison for her troubles where she tries to escape and later is mixed up in a hostage situation.
I'm not going to lie to you guys, alot of the classic exploitation elements are here. There is alot of female nudity (some male nudity, but no penis... sorry girls) through out the film and plenty over the top violence. What sets this film apart from others in the genre is the fact that the story and the action os all prtrayed very tastefully and the film over all is very emotionally driven. it did not feel at all like the movie was an excuse to get a bunch of hot (and some of them were pretty hot!) japanese girls to parade around naked, there was very good stroy to tie it all together. A story so good that I've already to dedicated the next to blog posts to the films two sequals. There were however some unintentional laughs. Mainly from feighned hits between characters. More than a few times, one character would strike another, clearly missing by about a half a foot, and the character on the receiving end would over react. But all in all, I didn't feel that hindered the film at all. Lets hope the sequals are as good!
I don't even know where to begin with what is wrong with this film. Have you ever sat through a movie to see the main characters make a stupid pun at the end just before the credits role and wonder if the entire film was written just for that one pun? That pretty much sums up how I feel right now. For a film that runs a little more than an hour and a half, the best part is when they make the lame joke at the end (well, that and when the credits finally came). "Retardead (after having viewed the film I realize now just how appropriate that title is)" was written, directed, produced and stars Rick Popko and Dan West. It also features Tony Adams and Michael Allen. All of the people mentioned should feel ashamed.
The movie opens with some fake trailers (A la "Grindhouse"), then flows into a film that is supposed to be a sequel to "Monsturd." The plot revolves around a little girl telling a story (that aspect of the film is for some reason abandoned by the end of the film) about a mad man who creates zombies out of mentally challenged adults who for some reason are in a classroom like setting (this is never explained). The problem with the movie is that until about half way through, it's a movie about the police chasing a guy who masturbates in public. The movie as a whole falls short because of bad acting, bad camera work (it feels like the movie was shot on hand held digital cameras) and the nagging feeling that the film was written by a thirteen year old. Overall it was just boring.
Problem: I have a script that is pretty awesome and a cast that is ready to go, but I don't have enough money to actually bring in sets or cameras or lights or anything like that. What do I do? Solution: Get a bunch of public domain films, cut them all together and erase the original sound, then get my friends to record original dialogue. Believe it or not, it actually works quite well for this one.
"Sex Galaxy" was written and directed by Mike Davis and stars Ben Phillips, Anthony Jenkins and Casey Robinson. I kid you not, this movie was hilarious. The film is mainly a retooling of the sci-fi classic "Voyage To The Planet Of Prehistoric Women." In that film a team of astronauts crash down on Venus to find scantily clad women an weird monsters. In this new movie, however, 100 years into Earth's future, sex has been outlawed to control the population and global warming has pretty much left the place a mess. So two astronauts team up to take their friend to, you guessed it, the Sex Galaxy so he can get laid at least once before he gets married.
If you could mix "Mystery Science Theater 3000" with "Whats Up Tiger Lilly" and "American Pie," what you would get is "Sex Galaxy!" Don't let the name or the thirteen-year-old-boy-mentality behind the films premise fool you, this is one of the most entertaining films I've seen in a very long time. It has plenty of sci-fi cheesy-ness to it and is not afraid at all to make fun of it's self. The nudity in this film also comes from old public domain films and actually serves to the entertainment value of the film. It's fun to see where they cut in old stag films and to here the characters make raunchy jokes with really bad dub jobs. Don't let the name fool you, this is a true can't miss B-Film. If I had seen it a few months ago, it might very well be holding a spot on the bucket list!
Hell-o B-Movie fans! First and foremost I must apologize for being a day late on this one. I was working on a bit yesterday with the wonderful people over at depravityave.com. It was some of the most fun I've had in a while, and a big thank you to those guys for letting me participate. That being said, this week's film is the 1980 cult slasher film Maniac!
This is film directed by William Lustig, and stars Joe Spinell, Caroline Munro and Abigail Clayton. The plot revolves around a grown man who's mother died while he was a child and now he feels compelled to go out at night and murder women (why does that sound so familiar... Ki, ki, ki ... Ah, ah, ah). Believe it or not, this one was actually pretty entertaining. It was very well paced and did not hold back on the gore at all. Keep a look out for a cameo appearance by legendary special effects artist Tom Savini, as well (he's the guy taking a shotgun blast to the face). Fun Fact: Rumor has it, the song "Maniac" was originally written for this film, but was left on the cutting room floor. Later it was rerecorded with different lyrics and used in the film "Flashdance."
So, I have to give this film pretty high marks! It's definitely effective and very creepy. If your a real horror fan (or porn fan) you'll get a good kick out of some of the cameos and references to classic Italian horror films. I should also note that in contrast to some of this films contemporaries, the acting and dialogue is actually pretty good and really goes a long way to sell the action. Not a bad way to spend ninety minutes if you ask me.
Love,
The B-Movie Guy.
P.S.
Allow me to tell you a story. I couldn't help but laugh a little to myself when I saw Tom Savini pop up in this film. The reason is because some years ago, The B-movie Wife, Myself and our friend Jason were making plans to go to a convention. This was going to be a particular big one for Jason and I. One of our favorite movies at the time was "Day of the Dead," and the man responsible for the special effects, Mr. Savini, was going to be in attendance signing autographs and answering questions. About an hour before the con, I called Jason to tell him I was on my way to pick him up. He informed me that his girlfriend, who apparently had bought season passes to Sea World, informed him that morning that they taking their son to see world that morning.
"Dude! We're talking about TOM SAVINI!"
"You think I don't know that?! She said I can't miss this. It's a chance to bond with my kid."
"You can do that tomorrow!"
"Sorry."
So fast forward about an hour, The Mrs. and I are at the hotel and walking towards the convention hall and she's asking me what I'd like to do first. I respond, "Well let's find an ATM, then we'll hi... OH HOLY CRAP THAT'S TOM SAVINI STANDING RIGHT OVER THERE!" He actually here's me say this and gives me a somewhat shocked look. Later in the day I collect myself and go over to his booth and apologize for my out burst and we spend a little time making polite conversation. Then I explain to him that my friend Jason was supposed to join us on this excursion but his girlfriend (not wife, girlfriend) pulled the leash and made him got to Sea World instead. At this Tom actually looks offended and repeats "Sea World?!" He then (no joke) took an 8x10 photo of himself and a sharpie and starts writing on it, signs it and hands it to me and says, "Make sure he gets this."
I thanked him and walked away satisfied with meeting and having an experience with one of my childhood idols. Later I read the photo and it said, "Dear Jason, Sorry you're so pussy-whipped. Love, Tom." True story!
Score: 2 Out Of 10
