Monday, March 19, 2012

The Immortalizer (So Bad You Probably Shouldn't Even Read A Review)

Score: 3 Out Of 10
          Every time I think I find the worst movie ever I prove Myself wrong. "The Immortalizer" is so bad that I even have a hard time trying to find information about it online. It's almost as if the entire world has acknowledged how bad it is and decided to just forget it. After watching it I can't say I blame anyone for wanting to forget it. It was directed by Joel Bender (any "Power Ranger" fans out there should recognize that name) and stars Ron Ray, Chris Crone and Clarke Lindsey. None of these people do a good job on this film and all should feel ashamed of it. I hope the memory of this movie haunts their dreams at night. I feel really bad giving this film a bad review. The reason is because I almost always love 80's horror movies. This was the decade that really brought some memorable scares, a lot of which are mentioned on the "B-Movie Bucket List," by the way, but this one just makes the entire decade look bad.

          The plot is as simple as it is boring. A mad doctor kidnaps young people so old people will pay him to put their brains in the younger bodies. That's it. How they managed to get more than an hour out of that plot is beyond me, but somehow they managed to drag it out to about an hour and a half. When I say drag, by the way, I really mean DRAG. This movie was so unbelievably boring I had a hard time sitting through it. I made it about half way then I pulled out the iPad and started reading the IMDB page for it. That led me to the IMDB page for "Power Rangers" and, I'm not kidding when I say this, I got way more interested reading the trivia section for "Power Rangers" than I did actually watching the movie. Do yourself a favor, if you feel like watching this movie, instead click the link for "MMPR" and read the trivia section instead. It's WAY more interesting.

  The B-Movie Guy.

 Twitter: @BMovieguy   #Bmovieblog   #Theimmortalizer

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